Travel and Leisure Magazine recently named Charleston the second most romantic city in America behind Honolulu and in front of classic cities like San Francisco and New York. That would seem to be a pressure position to be in. Is it a romantic city? With its palm tree lined streets, shopping districts, and peaceful park-lined water views, it certainly seems to hang with the best of them. On a recent getaway I joked that these features, coupled with a 40% chance of summer showers might lead us to break into a chorus of Neil Sedaka’s lovely classic, “Laughter in the Rain.” Sure enough, on our first walk through the city we found ourselves running through raindrops and huddled under southern awnings, romantic moments broken only when I ran off across the cobblestone side streets to buy umbrellas at a 150 year old general store. The fact that we walked slowly back to our hotel under the umbrellas through streams of sunlight and bursts of humidity, let me know that this place was a special one to exhale in.

Choosing to stay at the Marriot Renaissance in the historic district, we found ourselves steps away from King Street, one of Charleston’s oldest streets. It runs far north through one of the cities party centers, down to the historic district with its diverse shopping and restaurants, and all the way south through homes and ending at Charleston Harbor and White Point Gardens Park.

Most of our walking experiences were based in this area but we were at no loss for things to do and of course, eat. On the north end, 2 blocks off King St., we enjoyed our first taste of Charleston at Alluettes Café. This is a family owned business and owner Alluette Jones-Smalls acts as your personal chef in the cozy café. She came out and discussed wants and needs with customers and went back in the kitchen. There she prepared our exceptionally delicious, holistically healthy soul foods in her “no pork” kitchen. Fish, shrimp, organic meats, vegetarian, and vegan choices were available. Alluette also owns and operates a jazz café on Calhoun St, between King and Meeting Streets. We spent one of our evenings with other jazz lovers listening to an excellent live house band, while being served even more of Alluettes menu items. It was a relaxed atmosphere with romance and joy infused into the night. Couples danced. Singles shared drinks. The band played “Lost Without You” by Robin Thicke twice. Perhaps they did this because during the first time, I left my table and grooved solo next to the keyboard player. Did they (and Rochelle) want to see that again? Who knows? It was just a great night.

Juanita Greenberg’s, also on King Street, brags out front that they have World Famous Margaritas. I had to try them. Not very tasty, but they were very tequila loaded which is probably why they gained their world status. It took no time at all before we were smiling from their effect and accepting of Greenberg’s unfortunately ultra sparse menu selection. We spilled out into the night air and realized that it being near midnight, King St. was beginning to come to life and party goers were wandering up and down the corridors. We were swept over to the sounds of House Trance music and discovered Club Pantheon, the centrally located club with a door sign welcoming those of “alternative lifestyles.” I know what that means and I embrace it, but this night in Pantheon, the alternative looked more like a place were people of all ages, races, and sexualities could dance into the night until the lights came up and the bouncers yelled for everyone to spill back onto the streets.

When you fall asleep with tequila and dancing running through your system, you awake ravenous and seeking of big grub. Lucky for us Hyman’s Seafood was a few blocks from the hotel and is the quintessential big grub spot. Owned by five generations of Hyman’s, this is the place to recharge and we wound up eating there every morning of our trip. While it is a space for seafood lovers, there were a few filling items on the menu for crafty vegans. One brunch visit I chose fettuccine with marinara sauce. Great grandson Eli Hyman noted my plate, and admitted this would not have been his choice of a meal. When I explained my veganism he remarked that I must be a dedicated friend to sit and watch Rochelle eat salmon and grits, oysters, crab cake, shrimp, pork laced collards, and hush puppies. It was not a problem. I enjoyed my pasta, as well as the great okra and fried green tomatoes from our other visit there.

You can’t visit a place like Charleston without dipping into its history. We chose not to take traditional tours that focused on the supposed romanticism of the plantation era. I am sure that my ancestors fought hard for love and family during these times, but I am almost certain this is not the romanticism discussed on the tours. We instead took a Black History tour offered by Al Miller of Sites and Insights tours. Al has been doing driven tours for 23 years. I found it sad that this excellent tour requires a bit of searching on a tourists part. It’s not listed in Frommers Guides and there are no brochures sitting around the hotel lobby. But this 3-hour tour of Gullah and Geechie culture, a rich mixture of African slaves and the generations that followed after them, is so worth experiencing.

And speaking of dipping, what of those long beaches that Charlestonians flock to? We asked our concierge which beach was best for relaxing and we were told that Folly Beach across the harbor was the place that locals go to relax. It was a windy day but we enjoyed sitting and doing a whole lot of nothing while watching the tide rise and eat away at our sandy shoreline. We didn’t leave until the water had risen to the vegetation, leaving us no choice but to leave. Still, we had moments of romance. Realizing that worrying about our coolers and blankets getting waterlogged was preoccupying my mind, I decided to put them on the other side of the sand wall and came back to sit on the moving sand. “Come sit with me.” I said, and for a good half hour we sat and allowed no worries to be entertained while the waves came in and out and over us. Touching the sand as it washed around me, letting the incoming and retreating waves push my seated body whichever way it wanted to was a relaxing, relinquishing heaven.

Our last nights dinner was at Basil Thai, a small restaurant with a city feel, securely meshed in the southern charm of King St. The food was amazing. The atmosphere eclectic and jumping. Loud and bustling. A perfect setting to turn romance not into words but into unspoken body language- hand touches, smiles, winks, and promises for the walk afterward and of the last evening of Charleston’s goodbye.

Be sure to check out some pictures from my Charleston trip here, and on the photo journal feed box in the upper right sidebar.

The Links– Both Mentioned and Suggested Ones:

Romantic Cities List (link)

Folly Beach (link)

Hyman’s Seafood (link)

Marriott Renaissance (link)

Alluettes Café (link)

Alluettes Jazz Café (link)

Juanita Greenberg’s (link)

Basil Thai (link)

Sites and Insights (link)

Club Pantheon (link)

The Sprout (link)

A few months ago I started thinking seriously about a nudist experience. I was sitting on the sands of South Beach in Miami observing all the women who were sunning topless while being sexualized by many on the beach. Then two young girls walked past me. They were about 10, and from their accents they were not American. They were also topless. This started my thoughts as to how topless women are sexualized, particularly in the US, and that nudity doesn’t have the same meaning in other countries. What would it be like to consider my own nudity in a “public” yet non-sexualized way?

So, when the plan grew to visit Palm Springs, we started to consider places to try this out. There have always been a large number of nudist resorts in the Palm Springs area. Some cater to gay men. Some cater to experienced nudists, and these have a drop all clothes at the door mentality where everything from dinner, to working out, to playing tennis is done in the nude. Not ready for that. There are also a couple of resorts in the area that are purely sexual and for swingers. Nope. We were looking for a welcoming, non-sexual clothing optional resort where we could dip our toes into the process and be comfortable doing so. This was at the Living Water Spa in Desert Hot Springs, just a short drive north of Palm Springs.

It is a cozy, private resort with about 10 guest rooms surrounding a small courtyard that has a pool, Jacuzzi and sunning areas. Professional massage therapy is offered. There was no pressure to be nude, but once there we never seriously considered not being so. There were no gawkers and conversations were held quite comfortably at eye level. In other words, our nudity was not an issue to others, it was accepted as the norm in this environment. Of course there were nerves on my part. The first person to greet me in the nude was co owner Judy, then her husband Jeff arrived with a friendly smile and an outstretched and welcoming hand, which to be honest made me a little light headed. Yet, once I took my uncomfortable and self imposed blinders off, I let myself go to enjoy a wonderful body affirming experience that reminded me that no one is perfect, nor should we really care about that-it’s what’s on the inside that counts. And, that sexuality and nudity are not one and the same.

We didn’t stay overnight at the resort, choosing instead to take the baby step of a day visit. Although, I can imagine how wonderful it must be to stay at the resort overnight and walk out into the morning sun naked and go for a swim. During our time there we lay in the sun, and swam freely in the silky waters of the natural hot springs pool. The Jacuzzi seemed to be a meeting place and we comfortably sat soaking and talked to other guests about everything from travel, to children, to sports. Lunch was served and there was no pressure to sit in the dining area, the idea was about freedom. Freedom to sun, swim, and just be.

The Best Clothing Optional Starting Point in Palm Springs-Living Waters Spa

Want to Place Tennis in the Nude? – Desert Sun Resort

Walk on the Wild Side? Sea Mountain Resort

The Top Gay Men’s Clothing Optional Resort in Palm Springs La Dolce Vita

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Twenty one years ago, my mother, my infant daughter, and I arrived in Palm Springs Ca. for the first time. We had completed an incredible cross-country journey, with little plans other than to start a new life in California. Incredibly, my mother had entrusted me with the decision as to what city we would settle in. From my rock and roll mind and obvious immaturity, I had chosen Bakersfield, only because I knew that the Van Halen brothers had come from the Netherlands and started their lives there. Sounded good to me. Wow. When we arrived in Bakersfield, it was not the kind of city that I had expected. We were afraid of the urban roughness, so different from where we had come from in North Carolina. So, as we stood outside a phone booth off an exit on I-10, my mother engaged in a bit of her own coin toss. To the west was Los Angeles. Not interested. To the east sat Palm Springs. Interesting. Off we went. An amazing story with memoir to be published someday!

I don’t believe that any road traveled is done so by accident. We moved to Palm Springs and life changed dramatically. One fateful day, my daughter and I were suffering from colds and were sleeping together on our living room couch. She had a febrile seizure and was rushed to the local ER. There we met a kind young doctor who would treat my daughter, fall in love with my mother, and be a part of our lives to this day as a grandfather, husband, and stepfather.

Palm Springs holds the significance of being one of many turning points in my life. I lived there for a time, visited my folks there often, and last returned 12 years ago. I was excited to know that I would be visiting again this March. What would it feel like? What memories would be evoked now that my mother has been deceased 5 years and my daughter is about to graduate college? I’ll be blogging on this and more as the road less traveled reveals itself. Stay tuned!

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Miami Beach was a bit of an accidental road trip. We had planned to attend a 4 day qigong workshop in Charlotte NC, but due to a bad back that said, “nada,” we couldn’t make it. The next scheduled stop on the qi revolution tour was in Miami, so away we went. I initially thought Miami would have been too much of a distraction. Having never been there, I wondered if its frenetic, pulsing nature against the slow and precise qigong experience would turn the trip into a Jekyll and Hyde nightmare. All went well though. The small amount of free time from the workshop allowed me to have just enough of a taste of Miami Beach to find some favorites, and consider a return trip.

Miami is a study of contrasts that I had not experienced since living near Los Angeles. It’s said that every city has a word and for Miami I must say it is “juice,” as in the electricity and sensations from it that one experiences while there. The short morning drive to the workshop each day was frightening and exhilarating. Drivers in Miami don’t cut into traffic- they slice into it. All size cars from sleek sports cars to gigantic SUV’s zoom in and out of traffic through seemingly impossible openings. Coming out of a toll both is like being in a lane at a NHRA drag race. After one experience of nearly being run off the road after paying a toll, I got the gist: While your toll personnel is getting your change, engage your clutch, pump the acceleration, and be ready for the green light. I also quickly learned to drive with eyes not only in the back of my head but for Miami, I grew several pairs all around my head as I absolutely needed to see all sides and all angles at all times. This was the first time I can recall driving forward but paying more attention to my rear view mirror. There was always a car approaching dangerously in the rear. I constantly found myself playing some form of “reverse chicken,” as I would change a lane only to be frightened out of it by the sight of a fast approaching car coming at me from the rear. And I don’t frighten easy. It was amazing. I’m doubtful that there were any brakes applied. These drivers seem to instantly assume that you will move and thus protect them from what would be horrifying accidents all around.

Once we were safely and expensively garage parked each day, we were able to walk and see small parts of the area while on breaks from the workshop. Miami Beach is quite beautiful and so are its people. Lincoln Rd, which cuts through the heart of the area, is a shopping, people watching, cafe haven. Well groomed and well behaved dogs sit with their owners cafe side, and even the dogs have a “certain” juice to them here. South Beach, a 10 block section of the city, is infamous as much for its celebrity and wealthy citizen ratios as it is for the topless sunbathing on its beaches. I experienced both. I thought it very cool to be seated next to Cincinnati Bengals receiver Chad Ochocinco as I wolfed down my lunch at David’s Cuban Cafe. Found it a bit odd when Dan Renzi of MTV’s Real World Miami walked past our sidewalk cafe table at Carnevale, and gave me a subtle and low wave when he realized by some glimpse in my eye that I recognized him. I was utterly amazed at the regularity of cars that I would by chance see maybe once every 50 years in NC. Bentleys, Ferrari’s, Lamborghini’s, and Rolls Royce Phantoms cruised through the streets and were casually parked on the sides. It was quite surreal to see a tanned and thonged young woman park her Bentley on the street, purchase a parking meter coupon, then casually walk off to the beach. At another time while sitting on the beach surrounded by several topless bathers, I marveled as a beach vender strolled between us all, offering his items to each group. I had to laugh as he walked up to a woman laid out on her back– topless and reading Malcolm Gladwell. “Water Miss?” he asked. Even though he was selling bikini tops as well, he didnt ask if she wanted one.

Yes, bodies are freely viewed in Miami Beach. It didn’t take long or much effort on my part to realize that few men or women wear underwear under their flowing designer apparel. Got used to it fairly quickly. So much so, that I barely blinked at the photo banner outside of the Hotel Victor advertising its unisex steam room. The image (above) was filled with sexy young men and women lounging naked in the steam room sipping from long stemmed glasses. Ahhh Miami.

Check out the FB side of the blog and you’ll find stories and more pics I took while in Miami including: Ochocinco’s Lamborghini parked street side, the Hotel Victor, and the outside of The Versace Mansion (which has become a members only hotel with a purported $40,000 a year fee plus $600 to $3000 a night to stay.)–which is why I took that pic from the outside.

Below links to my fav’s from the trip.

Ghirardelli
How fortunate Miami Beach is to have an actual Ghirardelli Chocolate shoppe with extraordinary sundaes, hot cocoas, and mocha blends served sidewalk cafe style.

Carnevale Restaurant
Our host looked like Fabio, (complete with flowing hair, open shirt and deep italian accent) and the food was excellent. No one eats inside in Miami. Most prefer the sidewalk setting to people watch and enjoy the fantastic weather. Food was so good we ate lunch here 3 days. Recommend the Chicken Picatta, the Chicken Caesar Salad, and the Sliced Salmon Salad. All remarkably simple fare, but with excellent preparation and flavor.

The Hotel Victor
Walk in the lobby and inhale the sensual aromatherapy. A simply intoxicating hotel. Be sure and visit the spa downstairs. Unisex steam room for the daring and or body positive folks. Our hostess said people don’t get up till 3pm in South Beach , so if you want private time, go “early.”

CJs Crab Shack
Huge portions at great prices. A gigantic grouper filet tried to masquerade as a sandwich..but I knew better.

Effusion Gallery
Miami Beach is known for its art deco architecture and art spaces. This was my favorite street level gallery.

The Big Pink
The Big Pink is the retro restaurant in town. Part 50’s diner, part, Miami mecca….it’s pretty cool.

David’s Cuban Cafe
Open 24 hrs and serving authentic Cuban food as well as items as mundane as a tuna sandwich for the less adventurous.

Casa Casuraina
The former Versace Mansion. Take a look at these images and you just might be able to justify the pricy overnight stays.

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